Come here you fury little vermon

Groundskeeper: Carl, I want you to go out and kill all da' golphers."
Carl: But if I kill all da' golfers they gonna lock me up and throw away the key.
Groundskeeper: Not the golfers but the golphers, the fury little vermonts.
Carl: It's not my fault no one can understand you, crazy foreigner.

There's a rabbit on the loose in my neighborhood, and it's driving my neighbors into a frenzy. It's quite hysterical becuase this is the most action this neighborhood has seen in a long time since the invasion of the mosquito. Still, it seems like everytime I see one of next door neighbors they always ask me, "Have you seen the bunny today?"

It feels like we are at the zoo and the damn white tiger won't come out of his cave, and when he does everyone "ohhhs and uhhhhs" over the damn thing as it pisses and sleeps on a rock in the sun.

The bunny is actually owned by the lazy ass' who live cata-counter to my house. Down here in the south everything is cata-corner, other places it's kitty-corner. Which is another messed up word for diagonal. Just sounds funnier. Anyways after refuted attempts by myself and others to get them to take care of the rabbit, it has gone unfettered and now is considered a wild rabbit.
Now my neighbor Dave, who lives two houses down, has a brown lab who goes nuts chasing the damn thing around. This creates quite a funny spectacle on a hot humid afternoon. Still, the best laid plains are kept secret. I have gone into underground discussion with Dave to do a catch and release. Although he doesn't want to release the rabbit, unless it's into a boiling pot of water for stew. (They eat anything around here, nutria story another time) Dave is a hunter on the weekends and has a squirrel trap that would work great for catching this little bastard. And this little sucker is a tough catch. I watched two grown men chase this thing around in circles for a half-hour before both of them ran each other over in hot pursuit. Needless to say this Three Stooges act couldn't last quite long enough. So, the plan is still to sneak out a dawn early one morning in hopes of catching the fury bunny, then taking him to be released out into the wild or as Dave would have it, to the butcher shop down the street. This would calm the fears of all my elderly neighbors, which their are about 90 percent living in my area. When we go for a walk in the afternoon, I feel like I'm in a scene from the movie Cocoon. Anyways, the rabbit's last few days of roaming the streets of Old Metairie are dwindling. Next up is the race of his lifetime against the desert tortoise.